Me - 6 months later

Well here we are.  6 months later.  As you can see things are going well.  My scar is no longer very red, but a thin line thats barely there.  The 6 months have gone by so fast.   Next up my follow up appointment in July.  Stay tuned.

What did I learn today.......

A whole lot of nothing!

Today was the 6 week follow up from my surgery on June 2.  The doctor poked and prodded and looked in all the obvious places and found nothing.  Get your mind out of the gutter, I'm talking my ears, nose and throat.  He felt all around and basically said any weird lumps and bumps are just everything trying to move back into place now that the mass is gone.

After he dazzled me with his smile, he was able to confirm a few things for me.  Yes the tumor was rare, but thats the way things go sometimes.  I got lucky, pure and simple.  Tumors of the vagas nerve are far more common than my sympathetic nerve tumor.   It was a clean removal, which means he was able to remove all of it with nothing left behind, and the odds of it ever happening again are pretty much slim to none.  The odds of my kids getting it are the same odds.  It's not hereditary so there shouldn't be anything happening to them.  He was pretty confident that my experience was a one time thing and I shouldn't have any more problems.

The last thing he said before he kicked me out the door was "See you next year!"  Lets just hope next year brings nothing new.

Now what should I do with this sexy scar?  Im thinking just enjoy it as it is. 

Have a great day!

The Countdown Is On...

So I have made it to July.  It has been roughly 51/2 weeks since my surgery and it hasn't all been bad.  I can't update my pictures as someone lost my camera and won't replace it any time soon.

The scar looks good, still a little red along the line but there is absolutely no swelling to be found.  I still subconciously poke at it trying to find the lump that was there.  Sometimes I think my mind is playing tricks on me and I can still feel it but what I think I feel is the scar tissue underneath and whatever veins and stuff that had been pushed aside, still hanging out where they had been moved to. 

There has been no change to my other side affects.  I got a mosquito bite the last week on my neck and holy crap did it itch.  Its still a bizarre sensation to feel the itch and not feel the scratch.  All the scratching did was leave a red mark on my skin and no relief.  I can now track where the numbness starts and where it ends.  The only thing I wonder is how will this affect my jawline if I happen to get an injury there.  Not that I am planning on getting hit in the jaw any time soon but there have been times when I have tripped and wound up smacking myself in the face. Im not the most coordinated person on the planet.  Ha!  Will this numbness make an injury worse for me and perhaps lead to a bigger injury?  Don't know.

People still tell me "Oh I didn't notice your eye until you pointed it out" Yeah I call bullshit.  How can you not notice when it gets worse when I am tired or angry?  If it wasn't noticeable when why do people stare at it?  And believe me its not the scar they are staring at.  I can see the line of sight.  The squint is huge compared to my other eye.  I don't know if I can live with this lopsidedness forever or whether it would be better to get surgery to correct it.  Vanity sure is a bitch.

I still get aches in my neck near where the sympathetic nerve hangs out - the same area where the neck muscle attaches your skull to your body.  What its from I have no idea it could be the nerve is still healing itself after being invaded so long.  Again another one for the who knows department. 

I have 9 days until my follow up with the doctor and I tell ya its going to be the longest 9 days in my life.  There are so many questions I want him to answer but unfortunately with all the reading I have done since initial diagnosis I know he won't have a lot of answers.  Yes its true there haven't been any cases of reoccurance but how can you be sure since there have only been 50 cases ever?  Where is the information that concludes difinitively that a tumor won't show up on my other sympathetic nerve.  If the mass started because of a DNA oddity in the lining of the nerve, whos to say another oddity will show up?  Or bettter yet, something shows up closer to my brain.   No one can say.  It is so frustrating to not have full and complete information.

So in the mean time I am going to spend today partying like a rock star with over 80,000 of my closest friends, take in some fireworks and forget the world for a little while.  What will I do for the rest of the 8 days?  Laundry and dishes...because they won't do themselves.

And what have you been up to lately?

Ok this is so bizarre...

So its been almost 3 weeks since my surgery.  The time has gone by so fast!  I think I am back to normal pretty much.  The bruises from my heperin shots have almost faded.  and I am back to doing everything I did before except for heavy lifting.  The doctor didn't really say don't do it until my next appointment but hey if it gets me out of stuff I may as take advantage of it right? 

A few things I have noticed now that I have gotten used to my freak of nature look: 

Its hard to scratch a mosquito bite when you can't feel it.  I mean I know its there, I can see it, and it itches like crazy but I can't feel it when I scratch.  That is just seriously fucked up!

If I am angry or upset..which lately has been a LOT.... my eye closes smaller and smaller so that I am practically squinting.  then my other eye tries to over compensate by matching the squint.  By the end of the day i have such a face ache it isn't funny!

If I am angry my scar starts go red and throb.  Of course it could be because it is so close to my jugular vein but its still pretty freaky.  No one has actually seen it move but I sure can feel it.

I was out for a walk today with the kid in the stroller.  Pretty good tunes playing so i was going at a pretty good speed.  It was hot out and I was starting to sweat.  Funny enough I noticed when i got home, I only sweat on one side of my forehead.  I shit you not!  Over my normal eye the beads of moisture were starting to run I was sweating so much but nothing on the other side!  Great!  Now I sweat like a freak! 
I wonder.......if I ask the doctor, do you think he would be willing to cut me open on the other side, play with my other sympathetic nerve so that everything is all evened up?  matching scars, matching eyes, matching sweat spots.  Its a win win situation!  LOL

And what fun have you been up to lately?

Back To Reality

So here we are 15 days post op.  I still feel pretty crappy and the rain isn't helping.  The best way to describe it is a very dull ache - if you have ever had a knee injury or broken limb you know the ache I am talking about.  It arrives with the change of weather and only goes away once the sun comes out.

Today is the return of reality.  The guy goes back to work tonight for the first time in two weeks.  Its going to be interesting.  I can now unofficially start doing my regular chores and such but the heavy lifting is still unadvised until after July 19th.  The guy is really hoping it goes bad so that he can have another 2 weeks off but after what I have gone through I think I am going to suck it up and deny him it. If it means a setback for me then so be it.

I think the hardest part of being home was the inability to go out by myself.  With all the rain there was no chance as I couldn't hop in the car and drive myself and I really wasn't into walking in the rain.  With the guy so busy with his 2nd job (its a tech job that can be done at home) I couldn't even get him to drive me.  Since the surgery I have been out a few times but honestly its not the same as it was by his rules.  I really think I am going stir crazy.  I so want to just jump in the car and speed away but one thing is still holding me back.  My neck.  Do I risk getting behind the wheel when my shoulder checking is still below par?  I don't think its a risk I am willing to take just yet.

I wont even get into all the crazy that is going to be happening starting next week.  Lets just say crazytown will be returning.  If you checked out the first part of my blog before the alien you will know exactly what I mean.

ps - no new photos of the scar...its just a simple line now and no longer exciting to look at.

Life is but a speculation

So.  As I previously stated it is most likely the tumor was attached to my sympathetic trunk (which is a part of the sympathetic chain)  I bet a whole lot of you are wondering what that is exactly and why I keep calling it a brain tumor even though it was on my neck.  I will try to debunk a few things for you.


First of all what is the sympathetic trunk. They are a paired bundle of nerve fibers that run from the base of the skull to the coccyx.  
Ok say the word with me coccyx...it sounds so dirty!  Ha!  Anyway for those who don't know what the coccyx is it is also known as the tailbone and because we all know those Greeks are crazy it is originally from the Greek κόκκυξ and means "cuckoo" (referring to the curved shape of a cuckoo's beak when viewed from the side)  So the next time you fall on your ass you can say you fell on your cuckoo!  Ha!


.Moving on.  Each trunk is part of the sympathetic nervous system and consists of a series of ganglia connected by various types of fibers. Each sympathetic trunk distributes branches with postganglionic fibers to the autonomic plexuses, the cranial nerves, the individual organs, the nerves accompanying arteries, and the spinal nerves.  So to say its a very important nerve is an understatement.


On to schwannoma of the sympathetic trunk.  Go ahead and google it.  I dare you.  In fact I bet you will go away and come back 2 weeks later empty handed.  Thats ok because less than two weeks is how long it took me to find any information.  Is it because I was busy being pampered and treated like a queen?  Ha, hardly!  It took me that long to find 3 articles about it.  You could say it became an obsession!  From what little I found for a tumor to show up on the sheath of the sympathetic nerve is extremely rare.  So rare in literature less 50 cases have been reported.  Again further proof I am a freak of nature.  I could go further and make a ton of jokes about the junk in my trunk but alas that is so high school.  Again with the bad humor!




I know a lot of you were a little stunned when I told you that this thing came out of no where..it literally did.  This type of tumor is considered asymptomatic meaning that there was no other sign there was a problem such as pain, numbness, soreness or anything normally attributed to tumors.  I had nothing but a lump on my neck..that was it.  Crazy huh?


Who would have thought I would survive a brain tumor without having to shave my head!  And yes it was a brain tumor...but only classified as one because of the fact that the sympathetic trunk is attached to the brain.


Now for this thing with my eye.  Typically it is one of the signs that shows up if you have a problem with your sympathetic chain.  But ha!  mine showed up after because its the side affect of damage to the nerve.  The good thing is it doesn't affect my vision in any way.  My sight is as bad as it was before this all began.   Will it ever go away?  Don't know.  All I know is cosmetic surgery can fix my eyelid.  As for the wonky pupil, at this point I don't really know except it will be useful for freaking people out when they want to look into my eyes.  Honestly officer I haven't had any drugs..ignore that eye, look into this one!  


I guess the million dollar question now is will this happen again.  Don't know.  Of what little I found the odds are good that it won't but there just isn't enough information out there to definitively say I will be tumor free forever.


Well I think I have beaten this horse to death.  Now you know as much, or as little as I do now.  Don't you feel smarter?  








if you want to see the info you can google Management of Nerve Sheath Tumors Arising in the Sympathetic Chain its a fascinating read.

Isn't it Pretty!

These were taken on Saturday 9 days post op.  The arrows show where the scar starts and ends..just slightly to the right is the start of my hairline (I took the photo myself as my helpers didn't want to help me..lol)  If you look closely just under the scar is the wrinkle the doctor wanted to use but it was too low.  It is still quite swollen but all in all not a bad looking scar.  It is also starting to go pink

This is not a really good photo but it does show the difference in my eyelids. The arrow points to the screwy eye...the other one is how its suppose to look. With effort I can get them to kind of match but then it screws up the rest of my face..LOL

I can't seem to get a photo of my pupils..that will have to wait for another day.  In the end none of it affects my vision (the one thing I was mostly worried about when I discovered the side affects)  and its purely cosmetic.  A friend of mine even said to me she didn't even notice it until I pointed it out.  Thanks Amber, you're the best!

OK I just have to post this

I survived a fucking RARE brain tumor.

What have you accomplished lately?

New pictures coming soon!

Now let the letdown begin

I think I am going through attention withdrawl.  Or maybe I just expected too much and when reality hit I got disappointed?  Either way i am bummed out.  From the point I was diagnosed with the alien everything was all about me.  There was so much concern for me, my health, the state of my life it almost became over whelming.  At the peak it was a matter of OMG this thing is huge we have to get it out its on your 10th cranial nerve or the nerve that affects your shoulder you may lose your voice forever you may lose movement in your shoulder time for surgery lets get this thing out to OH wait a minute its attached to a nerve in the back you can go home now that its 24 hours later wow that scar looks great see you in 6 weeks.  That last sentence definitely described how it felt this whole time.  It was bam bam bam bam bam bam one thing right after another that there were times I thought I couldn't breath because things were moving so fast.  And now that the tumor wasn't as life changing everything has come to a complete stop.  In the beginning things were said, people were mobilized, plans were made but now there is barely a whisper.  I don't know.  Maybe I just expected to much of the whole situation.

Ah well I shouldn't complain.  All I got out of this whole tumor business was a droopy eye, a smaller pupil and some numbness...stuff you wouldn't even notice if you weren't looking for it.  I guess I am being too greedy to expect anything.  Maybe I should just go buy my own damn flowers and have them sent with a card saying "Kristina we are so damn happy that you made it through ok and that nothing bad happened to you".

I gotta go, this is bumming me out too much.

An Update

I wish I could say wow such excitement going on!  But yeah..not quite.  It has been a week of R&R.  Very boring R&R.

  I had my first follow up with the doctor today to get my stitches out.  It was a quick visit so we didn't go into a lot of detail about the tumor.  Just chatted about my healing and my side affects.  Yes its true. As fantastic as the surgery went I still ended up with some minor side affects. I now have some possible permanent numbness in my face but in an area that is not a big deal, my eyelid over my left eye is lower than my right and the pupil of my left eye is now smaller than my right.  The thing with my pupil is that it will not affect the bad vision I already had.  So in the grand scheme of things these side affects are all cosmetic.  But I am ok with that - better this than the permanent loss of my voice or loss of movement in my shoulder.  I am truly blessed.  I thank God and my sister in heaven for watching over me and making sure I will be back to normal.

 I did find out some interesting bits though.  The anestheseologist had a heck of a time inserting the breathing tube before the surgery.  Apparently my larynx isn't built the way its suppose to be so he had to use a special glide scope to get a better view of the blockage he came upon.  Wow, who knew?  Just more proof I am a freak of nature I guess!  LOL

The doctor is still a little unsure which nerve my schwannoma was attached to.  After checking out my side affects he thinks that maybe it was attached to the sympathetic trunk.  Once I am completely healed I am to go back so that he can put a scope down my throat and test the nerves to see which one is affected.  What fun!

So enough about me, how has your day been?

I made it!

I went through surgery, survived hospital food and now I'm home all in a matter of 2 days.  Everything went amazing and I am still in a state of shock about it.

I checked in at 8:30 on June 2.  It was very quiet as the hustle and bustle of the hospital hadn't happened yet. A hospital volunteer appeared to take me up to the unit I would be staying on.  I got lucky since the ward had a whole bunch of people going home I got to have my own room at no extra charge.  I sat around for about an hour which wasn't so bad then they called me up.  So I got all prepped and they wheeled me to to holding area where I would have one last chance to talk to the doctor and the anesthesiologist.  The doctor came up and chatted about how there was nothing to worry about but that he was still prepping for the surgery.  Apparently he still had misgivings on where the tumor was located.  He said that it was also possible it was attached to a nerve in my shoulder.  He said it was rare but he did some googling (I swear to god I didn't make that up) and a successful graft on the shoulder nerve would not leave me with any permanent loss of use.  Woah woah woah..who said anything about it being attached to my shoulder nerve?  So suffice to say I was a little stunned to hear that the doctor was doing some last minute googling.  Ha!  Yes I can laugh about it now...a highly skilled very well trained doctor googles..it still makes me laugh.

So they wheeled me into the hallway, made me get off the nice warm bed and walk into the cold operating room.  At this point I had no glasses on so I can't even begin to tell you about all the crazy neat things in that room...because they were all a blur.  The guy with the needle took two seconds to get it in my arm and I don't even think they noticed I had gone to la la land.  It all went like clock work but apparently the only difficulty was that they had a lot of trouble getting the breathing tube in.  I still don't know what the story is on that but even my doctor was shocked how much effort it took.  The next thing I knew I was waking up in recovery with the doctor by my side telling me about the difficulty and a big smile telling me that I was done.  Beyond that is a mystery as I was so doped up.  Surprising enough I had little pain from the whole experience.

By now its 4 PM and I finally get back up to my room and settle in.  The worst part of it was that the nurses had to come in every hour to check my vitals.  I was so exhausted from all the coming and going.  The doctor came in to see me and ask if I remembered our conversation.  I had no idea.  LOL  he reexplained that the surgery went really well and that everything he thought was wrong.  The tumor was not on my vagal nerve at all but on some obscure little nerve in the back of my neck.  The vagal nerve somehow got stretched over top of the tumor and thats why the scans showed it was attached.  With the little nerve in the back, the doctor is unsure how the removal of the tumor will affect it.  We probably won';t know until I am completely healed to find out if there is any permanent damage.  So far there is no paralysis of my voice box (which he was really worried about) and no out of the ordinary numbness.  He is completely satisfied with the surgery and did say the tumor was the size of a golf ball...it was pretty large.  I am still quite swollen so I can't tell how everything looks and I am still bandaged up.

On June 3 I was released from the hospital at 6:45 PM  I did so well with recovery and had such little pain that they felt it was not necessary to keep me in.  It was quite a whirlwind trip.  I am currently at home eating a semi liquid diet (my stomach can't take anything thicker yet otherwise it won't stay down) with hopes of moving up to oatmeal and pudding in the next day or so.  I have lost my ability to be comfortable because I can't move my neck too far forward or too far back.  I am currently on extra strength tylenol as tylenol 3s I felt were too much for such little pain I have.  I have yet to actually see the scar but I will warn you it is pretty large.  Pictures will be coming soon but I warn you they could be gruesome.

Oh by the way, June 3 was my 11th wedding anniversary so it was quite nice that I got to go home for it.  Hubby wasn't prepared so there wasn't any celebration.  Ah well...

Ooooh Pictures!

Boy the time went fast

So here we are.  Its June 1...the day before my surgery.  Oh boy.  I called admissions and I am to report in at 8:30 AM - my surgery will start at 11:30 AM.  It is suppose to last about 100 minutes so I will be in recovery by 2 PM.  Now that I have a time frame I will admit that I am a little freaked out.  I had surgery to remove tonsils when I was a kid but after waking up I had very little pain.  I think its the pain and the size of scar that scares me the most.  I will be marked for life on one of the most visible parts of my body.  I shouldn't worry about that though, at least the lump will be gone.  I am truly thankful that once healed, there will be no more worries...no worries of radiation therapy, chemotherapy, additional surgeries.  So what if my voice weakens, people get bored when i talk anyway, so its no loss.

In 24 hours I will be done.  Wish me luck.

We have a winner!

So fast forward from Sunday to today.  I had the follow up with my doctor about the results of my MRI.  We now know what it is.  It is called a schwannoma.  A what?
It is a tumour of the tissue that covers nerves, called the nerve sheath. These tumours develop from a type of cell called a Schwann cell, which gives them their name. Schwannomas are often not cancerous (benign). The most common type of benign schwannoma is the acoustic neuroma. This can cause deafness because it grows on a nerve called the 8th cranial nerve, which controls hearing.  
The good news is my particular alien is not attached to my 8th cranial nerve and thus my hearing will not be affected.   Mine happens to be attached to my vagus nerve.  The what?

The vagus nerve is either one of two cranial nerves which are extremely long, extending from the brain stem all the way to the viscera. Thevagus nerves carry a wide assortment of signals to and from the brain, and they are responsible for a number of instinctive responses in the body. You may also hear the vagus nerve called Cranial Nerve X, as it is the 10th cranial nerve, or the Wandering Nerve. A great deal of research has been carried out on the vagus nerve, as it is a rather fascinating cranial nerve.

Vagus is Latin for “wandering,” and it is an accurate description of this nerve, which emerges at the back of the skull and meanders in a leisurely way through the abdomen, with a number of branching nerves coming into contact with the heart, lungs, voicebox, stomach, and ears, among other body parts. The vagus nerve carries incoming information from the nervous system to the brain, providing information about what the body is doing, and it also transmits outgoing information which governs a range of reflex responses.

This thing has attached itself to the area near my throat. The other good news is only about 1% are malignant so the odds of this thing being cancerous is very slim.  All my bloodwork and biopsies came up cancer free so the odds are in my favor.  It is a slow growing tumor so I've obviously have had it for a very long time. 

I am booked in at PLH for surgery on June 2 for removal.  The bad news is that due to where the thing is located, once the nerve is touched it becomes damaged forever.  This means there is a chance my voice will change...and not for the better.  There aren't many details yet but it is something I will have to deal with after I have healed.  I will be in the hospital for roughly 5 days and then on extended rest until I am healed.  It will be a scary process but I will get through it.

For now I am off Thursday morning on a wonderful 8 day holiday with the Guy to try and destress before the madness starts.  Keep me in your thoughts.  I am fine, my health is fine, this is just a little bump in the road of life.

Peace out.

M - R - I can't believe it took that long!

Oh my god that was the longest MRI in my life!  Then again its the only one I ever had.

So on Sunday I went in for my MRI.  We got in there at 7:30 and waited.  8 PM came and went and still I waited.  Finally the nurse showed up and took me to get me prepped.  I asked how long it would take and he said "oh about an hour" so I send the guy and kids off to be back later.   I had to strip down to my undies and put on a lovely pair of hospital pants and a really large gown. It was not a good look for me.  I got weighed and told please stand by.  At about 8:45 he finally came for me to do the scan.  He strapped me in and got me comfortable and it began.  I was given a pair of earplugs as the machine was rather loud.  To me it went really fast.

The nurse then came back in and prepped me for the second part of the scan.  They needed to inject a special dye into my vein to travel into my neck.  And thats when everything fell apart.  The nurse put the needle in but as he taped it down well didn't the damn thing pop out of the vein.  He tried again...wouldn't you know it, do you think he could find it again?  Not a chance.  For the next hour 4 different nurses tried to find a vein.  They tried on the inside of my arm and on the outside of my arm, and in my hand.  They then switched to my other arm.  They poked and poked and poked.  I felt like human pin cushion.  Finally they gave it one last kick at the can and came up a winner. All told there are 8 different spots where the needles went in.  My poor arm is a lovely shade of black and blue.  Finally they were able to finish the scan and I was on my way.  In the end I had been in the scanning room for a total of 3 hours.  The people booked after me were not thrilled.   All they knew was that there was a patient being uncooperative.  Little did they know it was my veins that didn't want to cooperate.

Pictures to come soon.

T minus 28 days until lift off!

Time is ticking away from me at an alarming rate.  So I get a call this morning from my doctor. 

Girl:  The doc just can't get enough of you and so wants you to come in to see him on May 18.
Me:  Um...ok, my MRI is on the 15th, my vacation starts on the 19th so a quick trip in will be a piece of cake
Girl:  oh by the way, we have reserved a room for you at Hotel Peter Lougheed for June 2.
Me:  Ummmmmmmm oh.
Girl:  You know its busy season so we want you to get the best room.
Me:  Super Duper.

So suffice to say I am freaking out just a little here.  I am going to be so busy for the next month and a half that I am going to need a vacation just to recover from recovering!  Between Soccer 4 days a week, my mom visiting next week, my follow up appt., my anniversary trip, my kid's first communion,  I sure know how to make the most of my time!

I'm not so scared about whats going to happen, I always knew this thing was going to have to come out whether I liked it or not.  I am more concerned about who's going to look after the kidlets while I am out of commission.  The Guy works shift work and since he is taking time off for the vacation, he will now have to take more time off to look after the kids?  Its very delicate surgery so I have no idea how long I will be away from home.  I don't have any family close by to come and stay and my mom works so I can't really ask her to extend her visit to help out.  What to do what to do.

From my house to yours...

Happy Easter!

Freak of Nature

Hello my name is K and I am a freak of nature.  When regular people get sick, they go to the doctor for tests, the doctor tells them "Mrs So and So I'm sorry you have diabetes" or "Mr Something or other you have tuberculosis" , then they are send on their way to get medication or treatment. And then they live happily ever after or so.

Then I come along. From the beginning nothing has been normal.  From the first exam by my family doctor who got real serious real fast without giving me much information to ponder, to the blood test that showed I was human, to the trip to the first specialist who happily shoved a endoscope up my nose and two needles in my neck, to the chest xray that proved I was skinny on the inside, to the last minute appointment with the pathologist who did liposuction on my mass, to the CT scan that made me feel like I wet my pants(more on that later).  Everything pointed nowhere.

But lets back up for a minute.  That trip to the pathologist.  It was an experience in itself.  He was very smart but very serious.  I hardly felt a thing, especially after he shocked me by saying "This will hurt a LOT"  I was too stunned to feel the needle.  I swear, had I know he was going to perform something similar liposuction on my mass I would have asked him to take a little off my thighs and belly.  He took not one, but three samples.  and boy did I feel it after!  He sent me on my way and it was over.  Like a bad blind date, I left with the words "Call me" ready to leap off my tongue.

The CT scan was so quick its hard to believe that it happened.  I got treated really well by the nurse I dealt with and he warned me well about what I would go through.  I giggled a little when he said once the medium was injected I would feel like I wet myself but to not worry, it is just a feeling, not reality.  I got naked from the shoulders up, hopped on the table and tried not to think about anything.  The nurse was kind enough to inform me that they use a really big needle but he would try to be gentle.  At that moment I was quite happy that I didn't have my glasses on because I was sure had I seen the size I would have run out of the room screaming.  I now have this lovely purple bruise on my arm as a reminder that the needle was HUGE!  So the material was injected and holy cow I just wet my pants!  Oh wait no its just the feeling.  I checked afterwards and sure enough all was dry so I was ok.  But boy that was a strange feeling.  I finished up and went home to wait and wait and wait for any word of what was going on.

Dr. Bosch called this evening to let me know the results.  Dammit, nothing was conclusive!  There was nothing that fully pointed to one area and said "THIS IS WHAT IS WRONG"  Crap.  He goes on to teach me two new words #1 SCHWARNNOMA  #2 PARAGANGLIOMA  Ummmmm  ok....The only thing the CT scan and the pathologist could agree on was that this mass was slow growing.  Ok I guess thats good news... The doctor couldn't come right out and say its not cancer because again the information collected couldn't confirm or deny definitely.  The doc is now going to pass my ct scan onto a radiologist specialist to get a better read on what exactly is in the picture.  Next up for me will be an MRI to try and get a better look at the alien.  Where we go from there is still up in the air because of a) whether its #1 or #2 and if it is too close to my main artery in my neck. 

So thats the kind of week I have been having.  Why be easy when you can be complicated!

Cheers,
The Freak

Taking a minute.....

I would like to take a minute and thow a shout out to all my doctors who have been awesome in getting me such speedy service.  You always hear stories of how wait times in emergency rooms run 8 hours plus, or lack of beds leaving people in the hallway but you never hear of the people that have had great experiences.  From Dr. Singh who got me into see Dr. Bosch within 2 days of my inquiry, to Dr. Bosch who not once said this won't hurt a bit.  It has been a whirl wind over the last 2 weeks or so and I am extremely grateful that I have been put at the front of the line for blood work, chest xrays, CT scans and now a visit to the pathologist.  Yes its scary to be moving so fast but their kind, soothing nature and that of their staff has definitely put me at ease and made me feel ok rather than a freaked out hypocondriac.  I love the Canadian health care system and I am glad I live in the city where I can get the best care anywhere.  What more can I ask for?  Thank you all!

Annnnnnd the winner is...........

Dun dun duhhhhhhhh.....Inconclusive! 

So yeah went to the doc this morning thinking all would be revealed.  Apparently I am one appointment ahead of the doctor as he had no idea what I was there for.  All in all it was ok because as it happens he got the results from my biopsy on Wednesday.  The good news is that no cancer cells were found in the two samples...the bad news is this means nothing.  With any kind of lymphoma they have to be completely sure of the results so basically what my doc said was since the test was inconclusive, most likely what will happen is I will have to go under the knife and have the lump removed.  This will be so that they can test the whole mass to see what the hell it is.  I have not accepted this fate yet until I have spoken with the specialist on Monday to see where I go from here.  I should also know when I will have the CAT scan done. 

So now I wait.  Any questions feel free to ask.

Well Son of a Bitch....

Just when I thought I would write a blog to vent my frustration I get hit by a cement truck.  Ok I didn't really get hit by a real truck but man it sure feels like it.  And by the time it you all read this, it could be worse.

A little back story.  Back in Jan/Feb I discovered a sizeable lump in my neck.  About the size of a golf ball, located just below my jaw.  Time went on and it didn't go away so I finally asked my doctor about it...we were already there on another matter so i just casually mentioned it to him.  The visit went like this:

Me: So I have this thing, should I make an appointment with you to check it out?
Doc:  Holy Crap!  Let me swab your throat.  Here's a form for blood tests and an ultrasound.

Well I guess I didn't need to make another appointment.  Off I went and had all that done while trying to not freak out.  A week goes by and I go back for the results.  The visit went like this:

Me:  So whats the dealio...
Doc:  Well the good news is you don't have mono.
Me:  Ummm...ok thats good to know....
Doc:  I'm not finished...your blood work is fine....
Me:   Yippee!
Doc:  Im not finished!  The ultrasound tech is concerned that your lump has a blood source.
Me:  Ummm so that means I'm growing an alien off the side of my neck?
Doc:  It has to come out, Stat!  I am going to send you to a surgeon to check it out.  Let me know if you don't hear from them in the next 10 days.
Me:  Ummmm.

So I got the call from the surgeon that afternoon.  Damn things sure are getting done quick around here!  Its almost shocking!

Fast forward to today.  I go to the appointment.  The guy looks in my ears, up my nose, in my mouth.  I have never had such an examination of my tongue in my life.  It was quite the experience.  So far the appointment was painless.  Then the bomb drops.  It went something like this...

Doc.  Lets go to the other room
Me:  whaaaa????
Doc:  I need to stick this fancy doodad up your nose all the way down to your throat.
Me:  Ummm...okaaaay...
Doc:  Well everything looks good from here.
Me:  Whew!  Excuse me while I try not to throw up as you yank the scope out.
Doc:  Now its time for the needles
Me:  No one said anything about a needle...or two!  Or that they are going to be that BIG!
Doc: I'm going to swab you with an anastethic but I will warn you, it won't help.
Me:  WTF?

So he took the two tissue samples...I guess this is commonly referred to as a needle biopsy.  I get up to leave and he says...

Doc:  Want a Cat scan immediately, go to high river
Me:  Cat scan?????
Doc:  when was the last time you had a chest xray..
Me:  Never?
Doc:  Cool, you get to do both! 
Me:  What fun!

Then I went on my merry way trying to absorb what the hell just went on.  On the plus side of things, I did win a coffee at Timmy's...too bad it wasn't the car- then it would have been a stellar day for me!

So now the waiting game begins.  I'll call Monday for the results of the biopsy and when the cat scan will be.  So far I am doing ok with everything.  The guy is a little freaked but is hiding it well.  I'm coping by keeping a sense of humor about it.  When I was told this thing had a blood source this scene from spaceballs flashed in my brain and makes me laugh every time.  I'm twisted I know!  LOL

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Now dear readers..all 5 of you LOL, all I wish for from you is to keep me in your prayers and hope that this will just be a little bump in the road with a wicked scar to show for it.  And heck if I have to shave my head too,, then so what, I didn't like my hair this way anyway.

Cheers!

C-c-c-c-c-cold

So here we are in March and I am still freezing my ass off.  The average temperature for C-town is suppose to be between -7 and 4 C.   It is still hovering at -12 to -21 and that isn't even taking into consideration the wind.  Wind that basically blows in from no where (I can never tell the direction it is blowing in) and spreads so much love around.  I mean seriously whats the point of showing a temperature of -21 when really with the wind it is -31?  Why not say it is -31.  Its because the weatherman wants to give you hope that it will be warmer if you think its warmer but in reality you can still freeze your ears off if you step outside without a hat on.  With 110 days of snow on the ground and temperatures only suitable for penguins, I think I am so done with this winter.  It has been 4 weeks since all but 1 groundhog gave the wrong prediction so enough already.

I'm a Bad Friend

I sucked you in to my world and then I dumped you like a dirty sock.  That isn't what a friend is suppose to do.  So I am going to turn over a new leaf, and start over.  Forgive me for abandoning you.  I shall not do it again.

Need I say more?

Happy New Year!

Ok due to craziness I am a little behind.  So here we go.

 All the best to you and your family in 2011!